you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
no you cant smoke seaweed
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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