what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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