she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
Randomize