He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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