Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
