OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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