i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
