if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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