You can't motorboat a personality
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
you made out with another girl for some wings
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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