i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Randomize
