school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
