At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
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