Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize
