Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Randomize
