may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
We are two peas in an std pod
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
