Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Can I color on your dick again?
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
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