Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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