Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize
