Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize
