i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
