Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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