Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
organizing the empties. That sober.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
