If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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