But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
My pussy is not your playground.
I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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