I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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