Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Randomize
