I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize