i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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