and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
