BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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