Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
