Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
