she looked like the bat from fern gully.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
