and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
