gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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