What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize
