why im i the only drunk person in the library?
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Randomize
