I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
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