have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Randomize