How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
