I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
