Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
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