So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Shame - the story of my life.
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