Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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