I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
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