i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Randomize