I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
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