Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
