i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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