I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
