My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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